My name is Halle Kiefer. I'm a comedian and live in BKLYN. Email me, buddy! Frrrt.

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Thanks for all your suggestions, guys. I think I might actually go with a Chromebook. If anyone has any horror stories/thinks they are basically just plastic boxes full of diarrhea, please message me!

alexfrench:

The commercial I did for Wendy’s/TBS is airing now!  My hope is just to have one stranger yell “Booyah!” and/or buy me a free drink this summer.

Oh my god, I’m going to stand outside your window every night and scream it!

(via corypalmer)

Source: alexfrench

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Guys, I think I need a new computer soon and I think I no longer give a shit about Macs. What kind of computer would YOU buy?

  • Question: Selfie shamer - petervidani
  • Answer:

    Forever and always.

sasheer:

thepromcom:

Awkward Girl

3.25.13 Show
Written by Sasheer Zamata
Starring Sasheer Zamata, Stephen Soroka, Siobhan Thompson, Justin Brown, and Amber Nelson

Here’s the last sketch I wrote for my awesome Maude team, The Prom. It’s silly.

Two notes: 1) I laughed out loud SEVERAL times while watching this and 2) “ass-out in front of your church”

Source: thepromcom

stryker:

Feel like this image says more about modern love than any sprawling NYT think piece could.

IT HAS LOTS OF THINGS. I mean, this would be insulting if it wasn’t obvious this guy has never touched a human lady. He just needs a real woman like me to fart in his face for a few hours, then he’ll come around.

stryker:

Feel like this image says more about modern love than any sprawling NYT think piece could.

IT HAS LOTS OF THINGS. I mean, this would be insulting if it wasn’t obvious this guy has never touched a human lady. He just needs a real woman like me to fart in his face for a few hours, then he’ll come around.

Source: stryker

gabifresh:

Win any GabiFresh x swimsuitsforall bathing suit (along with a bunch of other awesome shit) in the giveaway on my blog, gabifresh.com ! It’s short lived so check it out soon. Reblogging this counts as an extra entry but you must keep this caption and leave a comment on the original post!

ME! GIVE THIS TO! PLEASE!

gabifresh:

Win any GabiFresh x swimsuitsforall bathing suit (along with a bunch of other awesome shit) in the giveaway on my blog, gabifresh.com ! It’s short lived so check it out soon. Reblogging this counts as an extra entry but you must keep this caption and leave a comment on the original post!

ME! GIVE THIS TO! PLEASE!

Source: gabifresh

"Straight forward….. You should know I am involved. That being said I would love to have an evening with you that included the following: razor wit, whiskey, a crashing of at least 1 party, a rooftop, my lips on yours, at least 2 boroughs, the rolling stones, the sharing of personal war stories, want, coy, otis redding, 3 knocks on wood total from our conversations, our hands in each others hair, 4 mentions of the vastness and wonder of the universe, a convincing that we love the people we love and that time is precious, an admission that we are not perfect, and a promise that we should have met each other a long time ago. If you can handle that let me know…. if not I wish you the world with both fists flying"

- jesus god, I need to get off OkCupid for a while

My ghost lover Jasper and I will be hosting tomorrow’s Dog & Pony Show! Jasper won’t so much be “visible” as he will be “filling me with an electrifying but terrifying erotic energy,” but you will be able to see such fine folks as Abbi Crutchfield! Morgan Evans! Katey Healy-Wurzburg! and Joe Stanton!
So get yr ticket here!

My ghost lover Jasper and I will be hosting tomorrow’s Dog & Pony Show! Jasper won’t so much be “visible” as he will be “filling me with an electrifying but terrifying erotic energy,” but you will be able to see such fine folks as Abbi Crutchfield! Morgan Evans! Katey Healy-Wurzburg! and Joe Stanton!

So get yr ticket here!

joestanton:

Dear God That’s Stone Cold’s Music!: II
Come do a 5-minute run-in between these comics:
HALLE KIEFER
ADAM NEWMAN
AARON GLASER
EMILY HELLER
and us:
ERIC SILVER
JOE STANTON
Happy hour beforehand, music, etc afterhand!
Did I mention the cost of a ticket? It’s FREE-ninety-five!*
*free dollars and ninety-five cents

Come come come to this show tonight guyzzzzzzz!

joestanton:

Dear God That’s Stone Cold’s Music!: II


Come do a 5-minute run-in between these comics:

HALLE KIEFER

ADAM NEWMAN

AARON GLASER

EMILY HELLER

and us:

ERIC SILVER

JOE STANTON


Happy hour beforehand, music, etc afterhand!

Did I mention the cost of a ticket? It’s FREE-ninety-five!*

*free dollars and ninety-five cents

Come come come to this show tonight guyzzzzzzz!

Source: joestanton